’Twas the night before the
holidays, when all through my body,
Not a nerve was behaving, making
me move rather shoddy.
My daily activities were chosen
with care,
In hopes that each one could be
done from a chair.
Each word that I spoke seemed to
come out all wrong,
So much to be finished, I had to
stay strong.
And John in the kitchen, and
Missy making frappe,
Everyone busy working, no time
for a nap.
When somewhere outside there
arose such a clatter,
I peeked through the window, to
see what was the matter.
I tried to move fast, to get to
the door,
But I didn’t quite make it, and
wound up on the floor.
As I lay on the rug, making sure
nothing broke
Through tears I could see it,
even gave it a poke.
Yes, what to my wondering eyes
should appear,
But the cane that I lost,
earlier this year.
Then the front door cracked
open, and before me he stood,
I immediately knew help had
arrived which was good.
And more rapid than eagles, his
phrases they came,
And he whistled and shouted, and
called them by name.
“Now hang on, now slow down, now
take more life pauses,
With stressful, and chaos, and
tearful day causes.
To the end of the checklist, to
the end of the hall,
Now dash away! Dash away! Dash
away all!”
And then I could see, as I wiped
away tears,
Why, his words and his wisdom
had settled my fears.
As I sat on the floor, too weak
to even move
He knelt down beside me, and
said I have nothing to prove.
He looked a bit weary, as a
glance we exchanged,
And he said that my focus is
what needs to be changed.
What’s important is family and
those who are nearby.
(On that last one he actually
said with a twinkly eye.)
Your weakness…it’s real. Your
limits…real too.
MS has this way of making even
brilliant days blue.
He smiled as he spoke, and I
knew he was right.
No more pity party moments or MS
fist fights.
He spoke not a word more as he
helped me to stand.
I found myself smiling as I
reached for his hand.
I sat on the couch as he gave me
a nod,
He helped me to see that my
thinking was flawed.
Then he sprang to his sleigh,
and to his team gave a whistle,
And away they all flew like the
down of a thistle.
But I heard him exclaim, “You’re
doing great, don’t forget,
To pause more and smile, you
have nothing to fret.”
*Penelope Conway was diagnosed
with Multiple Sclerosis in November 2011. She is the author and founder of
Positive Living with MS (positivelivingwithms.com) where she uses humor and her
own life experiences with MS to help others navigate this unpredictable
journey. She believes that staying positive and holding onto hope is the key to
waking up each morning with the strength to get through the day.
